It's been about 6 years, since I've started living in a metro city. Memories of my hometown, a small town in North Gujarat have started to fade, specially those which I wanted to forget. Like most of us, I have seen many kinds of people. People classified as Elders. Elders who we are supposed to look upon and walk on their path. Unfortunately, there are hypocrites among them. Selfishly orthodox, powerless yet tyrant, who abuse the respect given to them and bring vices of past along with them. Elders, when I refer to them, consist of parents, grand parents and sometimes other relatives too.
When illiteracy, greed and societal obligations take over Elder's minds and hearts so much and they start calling their tyrannical decisions, love and protection of their children, words deny to come out of a sensible human.
A lot of people have this misconception that only India is cursed by the vice of an act like Child marriage. They are wrong though.
Recently a video went viral on the internet, that shook the world.
This video is posted on 8th of July, 2013 translated and provided by Memri TV.
11 year old Nada Al-Ahad who fled from forced marriage arranged by her mother says - 'Some children decided to throw themselves into the sea, they’re dead now. They have killed our dreams, they have killed everything inside us. There’s nothing left. There is no upbringing. This is criminal, this is simply criminal.'
'I'm a human being and I would rather die than get married at this age.'
'Go ahead and marry me off - I'll kill myself,' she warns in the video.
She is a school girl, one of the eight children. She was forced to marry an Yemen expatriate for the greed of down payment her parents received at the time of engagement. In an interview with Yemeni news channel she describes how her parents used her elder sister for money, got her engaged several times for money and delayed the marriage until the groom's side broke off the marriage themselves.
This is one of the many case that came out in light, thanks to the technology and few people with conscience. Many case of forced child marriages happen everyday across the world, but they are not as lucky as Nada is.
Welcome to the Incredible India!
According to a survey by UNICEF, India holds 12th rank which turns out to be 47% in terms of girls population between 20-24% who were married before age of 18. And the numbers aren't decreasing. India consists of 1/3rd of girls around the world who were married before legal age.
So, why do Child Marriages happen?
India is still considered to be under developed country which consists of more than 80% rural areas. Poverty, illiteracy, medieval mindset and obligations of society are common in such places.
Keeping these common problems aside, further research brings out some shocking facts which answers the constant increase in child marriage despite several efforts from human rights and child activists in India.
Pulitzer prize winner, documentary photographer Stephanie Sinclair states in her article that in India, girls are typically matched with boys four or five years older, the husbands may be young men, middle-aged widowers or even abductors who commit rape first.
Such illegal arrange marriage may happen for the following reasons:
- A girl child might be arrange married to someone without her consent to preserve her chastity. Although, girl wouldn't be sent to her husband's home until puberty, yet she will be considered married and in case her husband dies regardless of her age she will live life of widow.
- A virgin 8 year old can be exchanged in return of clearance of previous debts.
- To preserve caste system, a child will be married to someone of his/her caste during his/her infancy. Thus, they cannot even think of marrying a girl/boy outside caste or creed when they develop their own conscience.
- Unprotected sex and no use of contraception leads to having more children than one poor couple can manage. To ensure other children's future and to have more manageable livelihood, children are given off, even 'sold' in the name of dowry custom.
- Wars between tribes still occur in rural areas of India. During war time it is wise to have alliances who can support you during crisis. Give your minor aged daughter/son to the tribe you seek alliance from, as a promise and assurance, thus, strengthen bonds with your allies.
- Protection from abduction, rapes and molestation of a daughter is every father's concern. So, get your daughter married at very young age before her body has started to develop and ensure her safety by hands of her husband.
- There are still people who live in India and think that an unmarried girl is a bad omen to the whole family. So, both girls and boys are married at a very young age to prevent that bad omen, sometimes even during infancy!
- If one child/adult is getting married in family, to cut the cost get the other siblings (under 18) married too and spare the expense of having separate occasion for each of them.
Such, reasons and such ill thinking still prevail in today's society while we love our daughters and sisters and want best for her, thinking every father would do and wish the same for her angel. No! These vile practices lead to destruction of future of the child, and only THAT happens.
Consequences
Children are the future of our country, indeed. What happens when children are driven into state where they have no growth or future, only stagnant life. And please remember, this is not about girl child only. A boy child faces apathy too. In today's age when he is supposed to study, explore the opportunities and earn for his better future, he is burdened with family responsibilities because he is now married and must care for his wife. However, it is the girl child who suffers the most.
- Many girls are forced to marry someone with a huge age difference, sometimes with a guy in his 50s. Life expectancy of most such grooms are very short. He dies and the girl is left with no one to earn for her. She needs to feed herself and in some cases her own children. Such cases often lead to begging and prostitution. If none of the former two options are chosen, the girl lives her life in loneliness and sometimes treated ill by the society.
- Early marriage of a girl leads to lack of knowledge about sex and reproduction, which leads to pre-mature conceiving. Girls of age 15 are less likely to survive childbirths and thus death of the mother and child are 5 times more likely than a girl of 24 or 25.
- Young girls married to a guy with huge age difference is most likely to suffer domestic violence. At that age a girl cannot handle all the household chores and thus gets beaten/abused by in laws or husband himself. As opposed to older women, young girls are 13 times more vulnerable to rapes and 3 times more exposed to be beaten. Many girls who are married before legal age show symptoms of sexual abuse or post traumatic stress.
- Abortions, miscarriages, unwanted pregnancy, rapid pregnancy and extreme depreciation in mother's health is very common when child marriages are practiced. 90% women report to have had no contraception used prior to the birth of first child.
- Infant born from a mother under age of 18 is less likely to survive more than a year after the birth. Even if the child survives the first year, he suffers from underweight, malnutrition and late physical and cognitive development.
The Prohibition of Child Marriage Act, 2006
(courtesy- www.wikipedia.org)
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| Too young to wed (photo by Stephanie Sinclair) |
Coming into effect on 1 November 2007, the Prohibition of Child Marriage Act (PCMA) was put into place to address and fix the shortcomings of the Child Marriage Restraint Act. The change in name was meant to reflect the prevention and prohibition of child marriage, rather than restraining it. The previous Act also made it difficult and time consuming to act against child marriages and did not focus on authorities as possible figures for preventing the marriages.This Act kept the ages of adult males and females the same but made some significant changes to further protect the children. Boys and girls forced into child marriages as minors have the option of voiding their marriage up to two years after reaching adulthood, and in certain circumstances, marriages of minors can be null and void before they reach adulthood. All valuables, money, and gifts must be returned if the marriage is nullified, and the girl must be provided with a place of residency until she marries or becomes an adult. Children born from child marriages are considered legitimate, and the courts are expected to give parental custody with the children's best interests in mind. Any male over 18 years of age who enters into a marriage with a minor or anyone who directs or conducts a child marriage ceremony can be punished with up to two years of imprisonment or a fine.
As a blogger, I am supposed to end this write up with a paragraph. But I don't see how, I can't think of an end because this topic, this issue hasn't ended despite several efforts. I don't want to end this article. I want it to begin now. Thereby, you won't find a period at the end of this sentence
